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The Technocrat Who Thinks Smart Glasses Will Replace Phones, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character' | Digg
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The Technocrat Who Thinks Smart Glasses Will Replace Phones, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'

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The Technocrat Who Thinks Smart Glasses Will Replace Phones, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
Trying hard to insert yourself in a scandal is never a good idea.
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Every day, somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on X from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.



This week, we've got a creepy old guy trying very hard to play the part, a musician who wants to revolutionize gig schedules, one of the UK's worst cultural exports and the man who ruined the internet for a generation.


Tuesday

Keith Olbermann

The character: Keith Olbermann, the original boyfriend, yet another creepy guy

The plot: The Olivia Nuzzi-RFK Jr. scandal took another sharp turn this week when Ryan Lizza, Nuzzi's ex-fiance, was accused of blackmailing by Nuzzi in a new complaint. In reaction to the news, sportscaster Keith Olbermann once again inserted himself into the discussion, because he used to date Nuzzi, and put his shoe in his mouth. He even posted a picture from their time together. Totally not creepy, dude.



The repercussion: Olbermann is one of those guys who you pile on (there's no shortage of garbage takes) when you have time to kill. Every second is precious, so why waste it on this guy? Because the Nuzzi news still excites a handful of people, those very same did point out to Olbermann what a weirdo he was about the news.



Adwait Patil



Saturday

Josaleigh Pollett

The character: Josaleigh Pollett, musician, morning person, concerned morning entertainment patron

The plot: Pollett, a musician, posted a thought that we've all had. Why not make matinee gigs a real thing? "Church shouldn't get to corner the market on morning entertainment anymore," Polett wrote. The follow up had reasoning, Pollett, a morning person, was tired of falling asleep at gigs.



The repercussion: Who knew gig twitter was so vocal about show times? Pollett had a fun time in the replies.



Sunday

Russell Brand

The character: Russel Brand, alleged sexual predator, conspiracy-hawking right-wing loud mouth

The plot: Brand had pivoted hard into conspiracy content as his star waned โ€” especially during the pandemic. And since numerous sexual misconduct allegations hit the big time in 2023, he has lurched even further into the world of right-wing politics and now eyebrow-raising public displays of religiosity.

For some inexplicable reason, Brand saw fit to baptize another person in a body of water while only wearing underwear. Why? Nobody could begin to answer that. It's weird, and everyone knows it.



The repercussion: Unsurprisingly, the internet isn't particularly buying the sincerity of this display. And even if this sudden religious shift was somehow genuine, that doesn't explain his choice to start baptizing folks in his skivvies.



Grant Brunner


Sunday

Mark Zuckerberg

The character: Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook, cyber tryhard

The plot: In a video interview, a messy-haired Zuck posited that we'll be moving over primarily to the world of smart glasses as our primary computing interface in the 2030s. Never say never, but there's not much reason to buy into the hype right now.

Under Zuckerberg's tutelage, Meta (nรฉe Facebook) has set upwards of 45 billion dollars on fire in hopes of making the metaverse happen. While this project has seen mild success with niche VR gaming, it's been a miserable failure in every other capacity.



The repercussion:

Funnily enough, people online don't seem to be focused on his pie-in-the-sky smart glasses promises โ€” they're honed in on why he looks so different all of a sudden. It's pretty telling that nobody is buying what he's selling.



Grant Brunner


Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, which featured Marques Brownlee's cash grab, a lively debate about Chappell Roan's politics, Sam Altman's revolutionary note-taking method and a Charli XCX fan who became the internet's enemy number one.

Comments

  1. John Doe 6 days ago

    Recent Google search on Zuck's browser: "Does getting a neck tattoo hurt?"

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