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[–]peterfonda3 672 points673 points  (25 children)

One of the realities of life - people will ignore you until they need something.

[–]Duranis 245 points246 points  (11 children)

Yep. Had a "friend" call me out the blue after not talking for years. 10 minutes in they come out with "you still working with computers, I have this problem". That was as far as they got before I hung up.

[–]finkwolf 71 points72 points  (4 children)

See I enjoy those 'friends'. I just tell them immediately after they say "I have this problem..." , "Fantastic, I charge $155 an hour (rounded up to the nearest hour) for consulting, I'll only charge you $100 an hour since we're friends."

Haven't had any of them take me up on my offer for some reason.

[–]Hounmlayn 17 points18 points  (3 children)

Bring it down to 50 for mates rates to seem reasonable. At least you'll likely get money from them!

[–]riesendulli 32 points33 points  (2 children)

Point is you don’t want their business

[–]LordZeya 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I used to play magic: the gathering at a local store before the pandemic. We’d play until 2-3am regularly so people would want food. Whenever I went out, someone would always ask me to get something for them- I told them my delivery fee was the price of the order, but anyone could hop in the car with me to pick up food for free.

People stopped asking me to get them food quickly, and most would ride along because that’s more enjoyable anyways.

[–]PvtPuddles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Eh, $50 for turning it off and back on again doesn’t sound half bad

[–]XxSpruce_MoosexX 48 points49 points  (2 children)

At least they tried to pretend. I had this guy message me from high school maybe a dozen times over the decade since we graduated trying to sell me something so this year I replied and said you’d have better success if you even pretended to be my friend. He replied lippy so I blocked and deleted him.

[–]Wolfbrother2 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Replied lippy as in mouthed off to you? Just so I understand because I've never heard that particular turn of phrase before.

[–]FanyWest23 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That’s what that means yes

[–]Druzl 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I had a bud who legitimately was a guy who would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. Very nice guy. But he was always making such stupid fucking decisions that he just wasn't going anywhere in life.

Eventually it just turned into him mooching or stealing just so he could stay at home and play video games, and he got dropped from the friend group. He ended up telling his family some lies that we kicked him out of our house and sold some of his stuff. We did kick him out after he'd ridden our couch for months for free, but we gave everything he had there to his sister.

A couple years go by since I talk to him, I'm at work, and I get a call from a number I don't recognize. Before I even realized who I was talking to my old pal was asking me to give him a ride from a buddy's house to his job...

[–]LordHades301 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yeah I had a friend saying happy belated birthday and this long message about missing me and what great friends we were... to then ask for my time to talk to her husband about career advice.

[–]donnerpartytaconight 86 points87 points  (5 children)

Hahahahahaha, this is why I don't answer the phone when family calls anymore. I must be the only person in my family who honestly just calls or texts to see how they are doing. My sister can't even fake the formalities anymore, it's immediately in to the "Look, I need you to yadda yadda yadda."

[–]Data444 36 points37 points  (3 children)

Same.. then I get the "It's been so long, we should see each other more" and then back to the old for another few months.

[–]Twitchrunner 14 points15 points  (2 children)

Something I do is try to set something up when they say that. The ones that really are just busy will try to make plans. The ones that never planned to hang out will make an excuse.

[–]Usergnome_Checks_0ut 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This one “friend” I had was like that. She would always be like “oh we should go out for drinks some time” and then never followed through on that so after a few times of that bullshit I said “ya, sure. When?” and then the fumbling and bluffing and trying to back out of it would start. It was hilarious. That only happened maybe 3 times and then they stopped saying that shit and I don’t hear from them that often, maybe once every 9-12 months usually to tell me this great news they have so she just wants to hear “ah that’s great, well done”, get that reassurance that they’re great, sickens my hole and I don’t bother making first contact with them any more and haven’t done for a few years. I might actually be soon due for an update, it’s been about 8 or 9 months I would say since I last heard from them. So any time between now and June or July I could get a message out of the blue. Or maybe they’ve realised they’re the one that always initiating contact and finally connected the dots.

[–]tankertux 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Which hole is sickened?

[–]chefjenga 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Just a few weeks ago, my dad told me that I'm the one who calls just to call. My sister always needs something. I was not surprised. Also, the only time my sister calls me is when my niece wants to video chat. I'm ok with this, but feel bad for my parents.

[–]Starfury_42 9 points10 points  (3 children)

My brother only calls when he needs computer help.

[–]peterfonda3 21 points22 points  (2 children)

My kids only are nice to me when they want something - otherwise they ignore me.

[–]PinkPeoniesRedRoses 9 points10 points  (0 children)

...when they want MONEY

[–]YourMomThinksImFunny 1 point2 points  (0 children)


J/K, I see my parents every weekend... for free babysitting. But they live their grandkids!

[–]MumbletimesChris Hallbeck[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Thanks for reading! You can see more of my comics at r/chrishallbeck

[–]Rexan02 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And if you let them walk all over you they will complain you are not flat enough

[–]mantrakid 113 points114 points  (11 children)

I’d just hang up without saying one more word.

[–]JapaneseFightingFish 68 points69 points  (10 children)

Tell em the password is "1 4M 4 WH0R3" hopefully theyll clue in once they type it out.

[–]Shubhavatar 47 points48 points  (7 children)

Passwords aren't visible when you type them in

[–]RearEchelon 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Unless you check "Show Password" or sometimes it's just an eye symbol

[–]JapaneseFightingFish 25 points26 points  (0 children)

When they say its not working tell them to double check by hitting 'show password'. They'll feel exponentially dumber knowing it went over their head the first time.

[–]mandreko 5 points6 points  (2 children)

So you can’t see it when I type hunter2?

[–]j-random 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nope, just looks like a string of asterisks to me

[–]sumelar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's visible when you write it down.

[–]Controlled01 0 points1 point  (0 children)


Seems to be working just fine

[–]sixmam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think you can add spaces, can you?

[–]acidcrab 94 points95 points  (15 children)

Good friend cheated on his wife and then divorced her. His ex was my wife’s best friend. We knew it was going to be tough to stay close, and it was. He called me a couple years later and I thought wow cool we can reconnect. Nope, his ex owed him money and wouldn’t contact him.

[–]Meshi26 45 points46 points  (14 children)

Not sure if I've read this right but- if someone cheats on you and then divorces you, the least they could do is forget about money you owe them

[–]shanata 23 points24 points  (12 children)

Why? If someone owes you money from the divorce they have to pay it. That's like saying someone in that position doesn't have to pay child support.

[–]DrakkoZW 26 points27 points  (9 children)

If someone owes you money from the divorce you contact your lawyer, not that person's friends.

[–]shanata 6 points7 points  (7 children)

Agreed, but you don't just forget about the money.

[–]DrakkoZW 6 points7 points  (6 children)

Depends on why they owe you money, and how much. If it's not legally enforceable (no contract), you probably should forget about it, because you've burned your bridges to getting it out of kindness.

[–]rydan -1 points0 points  (0 children)

lol. What are you smoking? Contact a lawyer as a last resort as they usually get 40% of whatever you collect on. Friends are usually happy with 5%.

[–]A1000eisn1 0 points1 point  (1 child)

It doesn't say it was from the divorce.

[–]shanata 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope but my first comment is you don't forgive money owed in the divorce.

[–]rydan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even if it was tens of thousands of dollars?

[–]innocentbystndr 31 points32 points  (1 child)

"Funny you should mention it! I was just thinking I should hit you up to ask how you'd like to split the bill."

[–]AliveAndWellness 32 points33 points  (1 child)

After a breakup, I realized some time after that my "continue watching" section of Netflix had a bunch of shows that I'd never watch. Then it dawned on me. Not long after changing my password, my ex messaged me and asked why I changed it. We were on good terms and both had a good laugh about it. Still felt good though haha

[–]boxsterguy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Rookie move, not setting up profiles.

[–]Beemo-Noir 72 points73 points  (10 children)

Fuck this hurts me. Too real.

[–]BeauTofu 57 points58 points  (3 children)

You ok bro?

I'll call you and I don't even want your Netflix password..

[–]Mackem101 3 points4 points  (1 child)

You want his Spotify premium?

[–]boxsterguy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why don't we just go halfsies on Hulu?

[–]felixlightner 21 points22 points  (11 children)

When I am done with somebody, I'm done, 100%. I am always surprised by the number of people who say this is "wrong". Fuck 'em, you bought it, you pay for it.

[–]Ocronus 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's a little more complicated once you've been married and had kids. Sometimes the love can rekindle after some time has past. I'm speak of course about people who just grew apart not relationships that ended due to cheating and the sort.

[–]honestgoing 4 points5 points  (1 child)

AITA: I changed the Netflix password within a week of breaking up even though it was a Christmas gift.

NTA argument: he cheated and I didn't want to see his profile name every time I signed into Netflix.

YTA argument: it was also spiteful because I knew the process of signing into a new Netflix account on his smart TV was a half an hour process because of how old it was.

I think attitudes on this generally depend on whether you're the kind of person to stay in contact with an ex. For me, I think that would hinder an ability to move on and just cause more pain. I don't believe in being friends with exes either.

[–]HilariousSpill 3 points4 points  (0 children)

“Friends with exes” is a whole different category than “friends with exes who cheated”. NTA.

[–]boxsterguy 6 points7 points  (7 children)

There's nothing wrong with staying friends with exes. In fact, if you're on bad terms with all your exes, you need to look at the one constant -- you.

That doesn't mean you need to share Netflix passwords or pay for their cell phone plan or whatever. But you don't have to be 100% "cut themout of my life" done.

[–]unite-thegig-economy 3 points4 points  (5 children)

There's also nothing wrong with not staying friends with exes. It's a personal preference on how one wants to spend their time.

[–]boxsterguy 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Perhaps "friendly" is a better word than "friends". You don't need to hang out with exes, do stuff together, etc. But it's a pretty big red flag if you meet someone who has nothing nice to say about their exes, because they'll have nothing nice to say about you in the end, either.

[–]unite-thegig-economy 3 points4 points  (3 children)

The original commenter didn't say they talk shit about exes, they said when they are done, they are done. You're reading way too much into it.

[–]Wu-Tang_Cam 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I fully agree. I've had one ex that I stayed friendly with (even of the FWB type) after we broke up.

Most of them weren't bad breakups, but it's just kind of awkward.

I think it'd also be a bit weird to continue talking to an ex when you're dating someone else.

[–]unite-thegig-economy 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Personally I think either is fine if there are clear boundaries and open communication among all the adults.

My issue is calling someone toxic or saying someone is exhibiting "red flag" behavior just because they no longer wish to communicate with exes. People have all kinds of reasons why they don't want to do that, and not all of them are toxic lol

[–]Wu-Tang_Cam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, for sure. I'm down for almost any activity between partners as long as both agree and boundaries are set. I just meant that it's weird for me. I don't think there are set rules for every single relationship.

I've seen exes be really good friends. My guiding principle in relationships is honesty.

[–]petesapai 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's nothing wrong with staying friends with exes. In fact, if you're on bad terms with all your exes, you need to look at the one constant -- you. you don't have to be 100% "cut themout of my life" done.

That's fine if the girl was nothing more than a fling. But if its someone you loved dearly, most of us don't ever want to see them again. What's the point? How are we supposedly to heal and move on if you're still keeping any type of contact with them.

[–]mayrataylor 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That took 6 months? I told Netflix to sign out of all devices after I shared with an ex. This was the day after we were no longer dating. I changed my password shortly after that🥳

[–]Halcy9n 22 points23 points  (1 child)

This just happened to me an hour ago, someone who hasn’t talked to me for over a year just texted me on whatsapp to get the invite link to a discord server I was on months ago lol.

[–]VIETNAMWASLITT 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Send them a link to the guy on ebay selling belle daphne's bath water.

[–]okcboomer87 9 points10 points  (1 child)

It's a complicated password. I'll text it to you. "FuckYouGoToHell2011*$"

[–]mahsab 8 points9 points  (0 children)

its not working ...

[–]AllSoulsNight 8 points9 points  (1 child)

BTW, I just started a new job, a MLM....

[–]FrankFlyWillCutYou 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's a reverse funnel system!

[–]K3rat 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Pro tip, they don’t give a shit about you.

[–]Ghost17088 36 points37 points  (10 children)

My ex and I shared a license for Office 365 in college. I revoked her access the weekend before final exams.

[–]golfjunkie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My pettiest moment:

My ex and I were together for 3+ years, thought we were going to get married. After we broke up I noticed she was still using my Netflix and watching Revenge (how poetic), I kept an eye on where she was in the series and changed my password when she had 2 episodes left in the series. Not gonna lie, it was satisfying.

[–]sdn 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Ha! This has happened before...

“hey u, howve u been?”


“hey whats ur new Netflix password?”

[–]AssaultDragon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's the ultimate leeching, how do these people not feel shame.

[–]noonehasthisoneyet 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Expected the other person to ask about his car’s extended warranty

[–]kaiser-so-say 10 points11 points  (4 children)

Jesus Christ. This is why I’m not a “people person”

[–]KMark0000 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Cmon, you cannot be this selfish, it is just a few dollars and you earn good, not like it matters to you anyway also you are already subscribed, so don't be this jerk! /s

[–]tplusx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

DM me your deets

[–]j-random 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I used to be a people person, but people ruined that for me.

[–]riesendulli 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can only give and take a certain amount. People will thread the needle for their benefit.

[–]EpiphanyTwisted 8 points9 points  (1 child)

hello, again, hello
Just called to say hello
I couldn't access Hulu last night
And I know it's late
I couldn't wait

hello, my friend, hello
It's just that there's this show
I want to watch it every night
When I'm here alone
And you're there at home

[–]shorepheus 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Every couple months without fail my ex will call me when shes drunk and say 'sToP TuRnInG tHe sUbTiTLes On' as a way to put her foot in the door. I havent even used netflix for over a year now.

[–]Newtonip 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Create a profile and name it "dumb botch". Them her to use it so her subtitles always remain off.

[–]nubsauce87 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In High School, I was known to be "the computer guy", and after High School, a few times, old friends would get in touch with me just to ask a computer question. After the first couple, I just started hanging up or ignoring their texts as soon as the computer question came up.

If you want to call me up and see how I'm doing, that's fine, but I am not google, nor am I your tech expert, and using the fact that we were friends in high school to get free tech advice is low.

[–]ObnoxiousCatWhiskers 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She called after 3 months, saying the account was on hold and could I please pay for it, there’s a series she was watching.

I said, sure. Paid for it, then changed the password and logged out of all devices.

A year later I haven’t talked to her. Sometimes I wonder if she ever finished her series.

[–]Visionary1002 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Been on the receiving end of this one..

[–]millenialfalcon-_- 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Son of betch.give me password

[–]Techn0ght 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So relevant. I think we've all been there.

[–]MrsChick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Does this really happens? Who does this?!

[–]natenate22 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just say you dropped Netflix and have HBO Max now. They'll never call you again.

[–]FlakeyGurl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I broke up with my boyfriend and messaged him to tell him I wasnt going to be paying for netflix anymore because I am not interested in using it anymore.

[–][deleted]  (9 children)


    [–]LeoRidesHisBike 9 points10 points  (3 children)

    They have to have a solution for travelling and mobile use first.

    [–]OG_Panthers_Fan 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    They're testing out Two Factor Authentication, with the second factor exclusively going to the account owner.

    [–]LeoRidesHisBike 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They could get rid of passwords entirely at that point. Passwords have outlived their usefulness for primary authentication, and they should die everywhere.

    We should all be using hardware devices (something you have) paired with something you know (a simple PIN, tied to that specific hardware device only). YubiKey/FIDO/smartcard/authenticator app.

    Lose your hardware? Time for an authenticator reset using an offline method (trusted email, phone, physical visit...)

    [–]PaladinKAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They also need a solution for their lack of decent programs. The last thing I enjoyed on Netflix was Extraction, before that Stranger Things. I remember when a Netflix exclusive was a big deal, and really exciting. Now it's just more shows they would have to pay me to watch. What I'm trying to say is they could cancel my ability for my family to watch the same account, and that is one streaming service I would count as a loss, and eat a sandwich.

    [–]xmastreee 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    If I restart my router, there's no guarantee my external IP address will be the same as it was before the reboot. How's that going to work?

    [–]OG_Panthers_Fan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    A device's MAC address doesn't change (though can possibly be spoofed).

    [–]mrBigBoi -1 points0 points  (1 child)

    I think that they have plans for more then one person using the account.

    [–]friendly-sardonic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Also annoying "hey, do you have disney+ too?"

    [–]Bananawamajama 0 points1 point  (0 children)


    Is it Me(2014) you're looking for?

    [–]spaghatta111 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Larry David?

    [–]Newtonip 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    My ex kept using my account for up to 1 year after our breakup. She didn't call me though when I changed the password.

    I didn't care that she was using it. I was allowed 2 simultaneous streams and never used more then one anyways. I changed the password only when I got a new girlfriend to let her share my account.

    [–]sixmam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    That hurts to read.

    [–]Jhowar49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Honey why you callin' mee

    Sooo lateee

    [–]Un_Pta 0 points1 point  (0 children)


    [–]victorbarst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    yea i changed the password to an anagram. B.P.Y.O.N.






    punch that in and get back to me

    [–]Lonelan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Netflix pw is $10 a month

    [–]alluptheass 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Please. Just, please. This evokes so much pain.

    [–]rydan -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

    Not really. What happened is Netflix detected a significant change in IP address so it assumed your account was either hacked or the password was being shared and simply wanted to verify your identity. Look it up.