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<strong>hello</strong> I am table : corgi
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27.1k
Posted byCorgi Owner9 months ago
Archived

hello I am table

177 comments
92% Upvoted
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level 1
2.8k points · 9 months ago

I am table

I hold the fruit

When you are sad

Pls boop my snoot

Yes I am smol

Can't carry lots

But I will give

It all I gots

I am table

I say again

Pls have some fruit

And be my fren

level 2
389 points · 9 months ago

You are a poetic genius.

level 3
level 2

What rhymes with corgi?

level 3

I got a bad bitch she cute like a corgi, her ass fat, yea like a porkyee

level 4

That was awful. I love it.

level 4

Dunkey, dat you?

level 4
10 points · 9 months ago · edited 9 months ago

I think "she's kinda porky" might work a bit better*

*claims not validated by the SRA (Sick Rhymes Agency)

level 3

Shmorgasborgi

level 3

Porgy. A type of fish.

level 3

That depends, if you're going for one word then, unfortunately, the first two examples I thought of were "orgy" and "horny" there's also "thorny", "sorely", "forty", "stormy" and "poorly". If you're just going for the same amount syllables then "for see", "nor seen" or "implore me" would work. Those are just the ones that I could come up with off the top of my head.

level 4
7 points · 9 months ago · edited 9 months ago

Is it just me or do none of these rhyme with corgi

e: I guess I'm wrong, but I'll leave my comment for posterity.

e2: only on reddit would I find myself debating what constitutes a rhyme on a thread about a corgi balancing oranges on his head lol

level 5
level 6

As an amateur songwriter I use all kinds of rhymes, but I also understand when people ask for a rhyme on a polysyllabic word they usually want the last two to match. Hence "nothing rhymes with silver," etc.

level 7

So you know there's different ways to rhyme but still don't recognize the way those words rhyme with corgi?

level 8

I guess I'm differentiating between the way a hip-hop artist rhymes versus the colloquial understanding of a rhyme. Like as I said, people often put forth the challenge "nothing rhymes with silver (or purple)." With 'imperfect' rhymes that saying doesn't really hold true, because kilter/silver or turtle/purple work. I think the average person wouldn't say those pairs of words rhymes, but you could hear a singer or rapper rhyme those words and you wouldn't find that odd. Looks like people don't agree with me lol, but do you kinda see what I'm saying?

level 9

You're saying that a rapper would say that forty and corgi rhyme, but an average person like you doesn't see it that way, although you consider yourself an amateur songwriter.

So you either need to reword your statements, or you are acturally saying "yeah they rhyme but I don't think they rhyme".

level 10

I think I've written enough about the topic already, and I admitted in my OP that most people disagree. I'm wrong, and that's fine.

Maybe go poll your friends on forty/corgi or turtle/purple if you want. I don't think they would all say those pairs rhyme, but maybe most would. I grew up hearing "nothing rhymes with purple" among other things, and even if in my songwriting I don't agree with that thought process, I can see why the average person (not a songwriter, that is). That's all I was trying to say. I really didn't want to get into an argument or write paragraphs about rhymes.

level 9

I do get what you're saying yes, I just think you're being too specific.

level 3

orgie

level 4

Corji

level 3

Nah let’s not go there

level 3

I’m a quirky corgi corking all the wine

level 3

Corgi

level 2
Corgi Enthusiast74 points · 9 months ago

That was beautiful. 😭😭😭

level 2
165 points · 9 months ago
level 3

Here's a sneak peek of /r/ilikthebred using the top posts of all time!

#1: My first attempt. Be gentle. | 211 comments
#2: my nam is spide | 143 comments
#3: My naem is cat. | 50 comments


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level 2

Is this from that album Metallica did with Lou Reed

level 2

This is Gold worthy.

level 2

And they say art is dead

level 2
4 points · 9 months ago

I should have invested in Reddit Gold when the prices were lower. I'd definitely give you a few pieces if I had some.

How much is it trading for these days?

level 3

Bout three fiddy

level 4

Damn, I don't have enough. Still more attainable than bitcoin though.

level 2

I'm saving this for when I'm sad

level 3

I'm sad

Here's a picture/gif of a cat, hopefully it'll cheer you up :).


I am a bot. use !unsubscribetosadcat for me to ignore you.

level 4

Good bot

level 5

Thank you itlnstln for voting on ThisCatMightCheerYou.

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Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!

level 2

I want to see freestyle rap like this

level 2

Bravo!

level 2

This is amazing, thank you

level 2

If you take fruit

You will be hapee

For my good fruit

Is never crapee

Make sure to tip the chair

I heard he’ll take a check

What is the chair tho?

A heckin llama snek

level 2

I am table

I hold fruit

When you sad

Pls boop my snoot

Yes I smol

Can't carry lots

But I give it

All I gots

I am table

Say again

Pls have fruit

And be my fren

FTFY

level 1

I'll take four

level 2
173 points · 9 months ago

Fourgi

level 2

hello table I am dog

level 1

Heckin corgo does a balance

level 2
21 points · 9 months ago

f r i c c

level 3

H E C K <<<<

level 4

Plz no swear fren

level 1

If you would like to see more pictures of this cute dog with things on its head, check out its tumblr page: http://thingsonhazelshead.tumblr.com/ ;)

level 2

Yeah. Hazel seems to be getting a lot of uncredited attention lately

level 2
Corgi OwnerOriginal Poster21 points · 9 months ago

Thanks for the source link, I wasn't able to find it!

level 2

Do they have an instagram account? I don't use tumblr but I need to follow this dog

level 1

I AM THE TABLE!!!

level 2

I AM I AM I AM!

I AMMMMMMMMMM!

level 2

Let's just hope this one doesn't break either.

level 2

BREAKY BREAKY! BISHI BISHI BISHI!

level 2

I was hoping that two kinds of people would get the reference - those just Metallica fans, and those who watch Botchamania. Reddit, you did not disappoint!

level 2
level 2

Not yet.

level 1
Renton51 points · 9 months ago

Thats the most adorable snoot i've ever seen. dont tell my corgi...

level 1
157 points · 9 months ago

F U R N I T U R E B O Y E

level 1

I'd say that is a good boy!

level 1
40 points · 9 months ago · edited 9 months ago

sturdy

level 2
-31 points · 9 months ago(More than 14 children)
level 3

Just because you put something offensive in your joke doesn’t make it funny.

level 4

He referred to the use of (usually triple) parentheses by antisemitic folks on the internet to indicate "jewishness" or jewish involvement. Like so: Dont believe the lies of (((CNN)))

level 6

Oh, so that's why I see that on the_donald all the time.

level 7
-19 points · 9 months ago(0 children)
level 8

You have literally never seen it there, slanderer.

I'm not even sure how you're qualified to make that judgement.

level 9
-15 points · 9 months ago(0 children)
level 10
22 points · 9 months ago · edited 9 months ago

You were saying?

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4u1y9u/top_kek_cnn_expert_analysis_predicted_trump_had_a/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4xl9sz/breaking_2576_files_from_george_soros_open/d6grxdt/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4xswgs/george_soros_leak_reveals_his_plans_on_flooding/d6i9cz7/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4xswgs/george_soros_leak_reveals_his_plans_on_flooding/d6ifql3/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4ryapp/lets_remember_there_are_a_lot_of_black_cops_out/d5586fy/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4ru6g3/blood_on_his_hands/d55000x/

I didn't have to look far.

EDIT: More:

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4m9a16/cnn_takes_a_new_approach_to_fact_checking_trump/d3tlrr6/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4m9a16/cnn_takes_a_new_approach_to_fact_checking_trump/d3ts0pp/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4soq7g/a_cnn_reporter_just_went_rouge_and_they_cut_her/d5b9ve0/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4soq7g/a_cnn_reporter_just_went_rouge_and_they_cut_her/d5b3bx3/

EDIT 2: Even More

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4p88ch/what_the_fuck_is_wrong_with_the_us_media/d4j1p8j/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/50191k/best_damn_current_year_ever_altright_in_the_media/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4rc5cy/holy_shit_good_morning_america_on_the_abc_just/d4zul7s/

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/4rc5cy/holy_shit_good_morning_america_on_the_abc_just/d502hr2/

EDIT 3: /u/DifferentThrows Well?

level 8

Nah variants like (((globalism))) and such are quite popular with his cancerous fan base in the US

level 9
-15 points · 9 months ago(0 children)
level 10

The mental gymnastics you are doing are amazing. 😂

level 8

I can vouch for him. I actually just now learned from that Wikipedia page that it has a more "official" meaning. I just assumed those T_D users were just being weird.

level 5

Oh, sorry, I didn’t know that.

level 1
level 2

golf clap

level 1

Awww so adorable!!

level 1

Hazel! 😍

level 1

Table is a terrible name for a dog imo

level 1
Corgi OwnerOriginal Poster6 points · 9 months ago
level 1

I AM THE TABLE

level 1

I couldn’t help but reading this in Andy Kaufman’s voice.

level 1

Why.......Why are corgis so friggin cute. I just... I can't handle it.

level 1

Not sure which is rounder: the oranges or the corgi!

level 1

That hamster looks suspiciously like a dog.

level 1

Day 7: they still think I’m a table

level 1

I love how determined it is!! It's like "Look i am balancing! Do you still love me?" "I will be table for as long as you want me to" "am I doing a good job?" "please i am trying my best"

level 1

Little Corgy Tables, we call him.

level 1

thingsonhazelshead on instagram for more good boye doin' a balance.

level 1

Holy mother of god that is one god damn good dog

level 1

I'll take a table for two

level 1

He’s a good boy

level 1

My new background pic

level 1

hello I am Royal Canadian Mounted Police

level 1

Is cute table. You no need. I take for you.

level 1
Corgi Enthusiast2 points · 9 months ago

Good fruit boye

level 1
level 1

This is why I subscribed. Corgis with things on their head.

level 1

I am stable

level 1

Aww the puppy balancing oranges

level 1

U tot I am doggo, but it was I, table the whole time

level 1
level 2

No we don't

level 1

Corgi cargo

level 1

I literally couldn't hold in my reaction of delighted squees scrolling by this, it's just too cute omg 😭

level 1

Is this hazel? I follow her on Tumblr

level 2
Corgi OwnerOriginal Poster1 point · 9 months ago

Yes it is.

level 1
level 1

hello I am table

Table is me

level 1

the content im on reddit for

level 1

T A B L E B O Y E

level 1

It’s the year of the dog and he has mandarins for good luck in the new year.

level 1

This cracks me up cuz when I took Nursing Boards, many years ago, it was on a computer and simply shut off once it declared you passed.”. So there’s always that’s week of waiting and thinking over questions. One I kept thinking over was something like “ You’re working in a psych facility and come across a girl who is always walking on hands and knees. What would be the first question you’d ask her?” And I Just kept cracking myself with “in my opinion you’d make a great table.”

level 1

She protecc, she attacc, but most importantly, she do a balancing acc.

level 1

How to get karma on this sub -

Post pictures of corgis with things on their heads.

level 1

Day 32: The locals suspect nothing.

level 1
level 1

How much for the table?

level 1

That’s a goo Ein.

level 1

...is there a reason why every time you post something you post it to tons of subreddits?

level 2
Corgi OwnerOriginal Poster2 points · 9 months ago

Because not everybody is subscribed to every single subreddit.

level 1

NARANJAS!!!

level 1

....... Moooooooooom. Doge is at it again!

level 1

To understand the table, you must become the table.

level 1
level 1

cυтe aғ.

level 1
level 1

Awwwwww

level 1

Tabel and perfectly balanced , are we sure he's not "stuffed" hahaha

Just kidding the dog has amazing talent

level 1

a veeery cute one

level 1

of course, you're!

level 1

i’m not crazy, i’m a fuckin table !

  • tyler okonma

level 1

I want one of those now.

level 1

hello. I am a juggler.

level 1

Yes, this is table.

level 1

He protec

He attac

But most importantly

He stac

level 1

I am the table

level 1

Of course you are!

The bestest of all table.

level 1

/thisismylifenow

level 1

Haha how it 's real ? :D

level 1
[deleted]
1 point · 9 months ago

he looks so cute omg.

level 1

Human, y u do dis :(

level 1
RIP Happy Jack1 point · 9 months ago

This corg kinda looks like a seal.

level 1

You are a nice table.

level 1

The bestest table!!

level 1

Recipe for karma:

Get corgi

Put things on its head

level 1

So sweet

level 1

Darn cute table!

level 1

No. James Hetfield is the table!!! https://youtu.be/4QhusT8fGBs

level 1
level 1
level 1

IAMA Table, ask me anything

level 1

Kagamimochi?

level 1
level 1

I AM THE TABLE

level 1
level 1

Carmen Miranda. Google her if you don’t know who she was.

level 1

Imagine what's going through it's head. Oh no. Master made me a table. If I drop this or fail, he might execute and eat me. Oh please master, have mercy!!

level 1

Videos in this thread:

Watch Playlist ▶

VIDEOCOMMENT
VERY VERY VERY BREAKY BREAKY BREAKY BISHI BISHI!!!+1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5uHdQARB-o
Botchamania: I Am, The Table (v3.1)+1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xnusqx-VnTg
James Hetfield: "I am the table"+1 - No. James Hetfield is the table!!!
I'm a bot working hard to help Redditors find related videos to watch. I'll keep this updated as long as I can.

Play All | Info | Get me on Chrome / Firefox

level 1

MAFF!

level 1

Is it me or is this a really fat corgi

level 2

This is Hazel, who is somewhat well known and a senior citizen. She's a bit pudgy, yes, but she's also 101 in dog years.

level 1

so is this sub just reposting two-year old pictures of Mabel for karma? if so, ill hop on board tomorrow.

just curious, because ive only seen this sub hit /r/all a few times, and its literally always the same dog (which isnt OPs) with something else on its head

level 1

corgis have an unfair advantage with this trick. they have such low centre of gravity anything will balance on that snoot

level 2
I will steal your corgi2 points · 9 months ago

Nothing is on her snoot.

level 1

Her ass fat kinda porky, but her face cute like a corgi, where the blunts at I need to roll a stogi!!! Fill the double cups up we about to have an orgy!!!!!!!!

Yea yea yea yea yea

😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

I swear I’m the next lil pump

level 1
-10 points · 9 months ago(0 children)
level 2

Bad bot

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Welsh corgi - noun : a short-legged long-backed dog with foxy head of either of two breeds of Welsh origin: a : cardigan welsh corgi b : pembroke welsh corgi

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